To the thief or thieves that stole a planted container of purple petunias and orange marigolds from my front stoop:
Why? Why are you so morally weak that you had to steal from our simple little home. For years I have worked to make this a more beautiful neighborhood and you, in a stupid and careless act, chose to destroy that and disrespect me and my neighbors. You are a vile human being. And for what? To disrespect your own name, your family, why? I hope whatever God you believe in punishes you as you deserve to be punished. Because if I find out who you are I will do my best to make your life absolutely miserable. After all, it was just a pot of flowers! You dumb piece of shit. I hope karma's hands come down heavy on you. For you are a fool. And you have pissed me off!
and if you live in or around Astoria and have actually seen this stolen pot of flowers, please email info or ask the fool to bring it back. Thanks!